When I was birthing my children time ceased to flow in a tic-toc way. It stretched and meandered and became something entirely organic – not at all linear. Time was measured by the arc of contractions – something that I had no voluntary control over. The universe inhabited my body – I was well and truly a part of something infinitely greater than myself. Surrendering to that process I tasted bliss.
The last time I gave birth was to my fourth child (eighteen years ago!). Very near to the time when he would be born I put on the song Alegria (Cirque du Soleil) and — danced — an act that was totally unplanned, totally improvised. I danced with the force of nature that would soon bring my son into the world.
“There is a love in me raging! Alegria!”
In the practice of yoga and tai chi this is the place I ultimately seek: a place of surrender into the mysterious flow of abundance, of joy and sorrow, that flows in and through me.